Thursday, June 2, 2011

You lose!! Good day sir!!

 And our winner of the day!!!

  Calling all the way in from beautiful Hawaii is........Roland!!

 Yes, this idiot called and claimed to be with US homeland security and demanded that I give him the corporate phone number for the ISP that we support there.

 Me: Sure thing sir....I'll get right on it....Hold please.... *Browses for a yummy halibut recipe*  MMmmm....Yummy....*forwards same to personal e-mail*....5 minutes pass.....

 * Looks over at phone*    Hmmm..... Crackpot is still on hold......*Hits disconnect*

  Rule 1: Be polite when you call me
.
Rule 2: Don't lie... I can tell when you're lying.

Rule 3: Don't demand.

 Rule 4: Don't be a dick or whiny in general.

  Look buddy. If you really worked with US homeland security why the hell would you be calling an ISP tech support line for a phone number?    Fail 1

  Secondly, you stayed on hold for 5 minutes.  Fail 2

Thirdly......Meh.....You're just a friggin' moron...I felt sorry for my co-worker that had to take your return call.  Fail 3.

Fourthly. Upon your return call you failed yet again.   Fail 4


The stupid is strong with this one......Fear Roland......You will become retarded through osmosis.

PS:  Dear Roland...They've got a great deal on tinfoil over at Walmart.

Just in case you need to make a new hat.












Wednesday, June 1, 2011

The birds have nested in my e-bike

  As I wake in the morning and make some yummy coffee, I look outside my kitchen window a notice some finches....Two to be exact...Sitting on my e-bike. One has a big bunch of "nest making gear" in his beak. The two of them proceed to hop inside the dash part of my bike with the gear. They linger and then depart without taking their stuff with them.  Hmmmmmm...

 Yeah, they were trying to build a nest in the dash of my bike






Update: Relocated nest about 4 feet away in the tree....


Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Way to go Sony.....

 2,000 Sony Ericsson Canada customers hit by online breach.
 
Yet again...Wow!!...I rate this at "double f**k with a scoop of ice cream on it".

No contact to customers...Yeah, nice move. It's the old "Meh, we'll just ignore it & it SHOULD go away" tactic.

Again, a note to the wise out there. Keep your stuff secure because these idiots are rather lazy.

   * Cough....cough.....S*ny....Douchebag...Cough *



Apple Acknowledges MacDefender

 Well about bloody time.  Denial isn't a river in Egypt.

If you are running a Mac system, please get your updates.  

Your system can be compromised. Click the linky for the interesting article.


 And as always....Have a nice day  :D

http://support.apple.com/kb/HT4650 








Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Yeah....I'll get right on that...

 If you call in to my support desk for help.....

  A quick nugget of wisdom for you....

  Don't spend 4 minutes whining like a school girl with a skinned knee about "how shitty the speed is & blah, blah, blah".....

  Next.

   Don't tell me to make sure "my" attorneys are ready for a class action suit because of the same.

   My tech support takes care of the internal network. That's all.

  The outside "pipe" is taken care of by an ISP (look it up).

  Yes.   The storms in your area that are causing a power outage MAY just have something to do with it.

    This one goes out to the douchebag university whiner in Maryland.  

  PS:  I can kill your account in a keystroke..... Ban your MAC addresses...You name it.

  Even though you spent 3 minutes threatening me with a lawsuit....

  ...........Sigh........Me thinks Darwin will take care of this one.










Tuesday, May 10, 2011

One word.....Faaaaaawwkkkk

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-13343600


Microsoft confirms takeover of Skype....


Great.                    Just great.

 I can hardly wait for them to fubar something that works just fine.  Although, I must admit that it's better than having facebook buy Skype.  
  Which is worse?  Death by impalement or death by disembowelment ?

 I guess we shall soon see.....  Sigh.....








Monday, May 9, 2011

Simple tip.....

 If you have to call into tech support & they ask "what OS are you running?".

 If it's a Windows based machine all you need to do is hold down the windows key....Bottom left....

 And then tap.....one time.....the pause/break key....Should be top rightish dependiing on your keyboard layout.

Mac users...Durrr....Click the little apple...Top left...About my "over priced machine".

  Need more help?  Try this link  :D

                   http://www.chasms.com/

                    Copy & paste the link

 Tons of info there...................Knowledge is power.